Coach Heidi

Resolutions

2010-01-06T10:50:00.000-08:00

Dear Friends and Family,

It's that time of year again when we think about what we would like to accomplish for the new year and we make resolutions. However, those resolutions often fail without dedication, hard work, commitment, accountability and a good reason to see the resolution fulfilled.

When we choose a new path to walk down, we have to say no to the things that are keeping us from our goals. We have to be S.M.A.R.T about our goals. They should be specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timely. People often set goals that aren't specific enough or ones that are nearly impossible to attain. For example, a woman named Heather might have a goal to lose weight, but to be more successful in reaching her goal, Heather should use the SMART principles. It might look like this: Heather wants to lose 15lbs in 5 months. She plans to do this by eating healthy, cutting back on fats, exercising 5 days a week and meeting with both a trainer and a life coach. It would be unrealistic and very unhealthy for Heather to lose 15lbs in 2 weeks. It would also sabotage her goals and her motivation if she failed. The goals have to be realistic and attainable, yet provide a challenge.

Heather's time line is right in line with setting herself up for success. Heather will no doubt face obstacles as she exchanges old habits for new, healthier ones. Additionally, having a form of accountability such as a trainer at a gym and a life coach to keep her on track will bring a new resolve to say no to that hot fudge sundae in a moment of weakness.

Whatever your goal is, be SMART about it. If you still feel frustrated because you fall into the camp of those who repeatedly set new resolutions and fail, don't lose heart! All you need is a little help from a life coach to turn your resolutions into reality.

Remember, "A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul." Proverbs 13:19

Maybe this year it's time to set a different kind of resolution. See if the following ideas might spark some creativity for a new kind of resolution for 2010:

Give yourself and others more grace
End negativity and criticism
Laugh more
End Blaming
Forgive others and yourself
Believe in yourself and the amazing gifts you've been given
Celebrate your gorgeous friendships with women
Practice extravagant loving
Slow down
Say No more often
Explore nature
Lean a new hobby
Celebrate even when there is no reason to celebrate...make up a reason!

Whatever your resolutions are, may your 2010 be filled with life, love and laughter.

Warmly,

Coach Heidi

By the way, if you are interested in exploring the possibility of hiring a Life Coach, I offer a complimentary session. Just call me at 509.860.7170 to set up your free session.

Simple Christmas

2010-01-06T10:34:00.001-08:00

This past Christmas my mother in law was dying of Cancer and the entire family on my husband's side seemed to be falling apart. Kelly (my husband) did his best to be the strong one and speak truth and life into a dark and desperate situation. The family members stood by her bedside and watched her waste away. Slowly her body was shutting down and she was losing her ability to speak, bathe herself, walk, eat on her own, and so on. Death is a gruesome, horrific, unnerving process to observe. To touch it, taste it, and see it up close shakes you to the core and leaves you feeling out of control and helpless. Life, however, is beautiful when you have the assurance of eternal life.

Although my husband was heartbroken over his mom's condition, he had the hope of eternal life in his heart to soften the blow of her death. He knew that even though his mom's body would quit functioning and eventually die, she would live forever in heaven where morphine would no longer be needed. There she would feel no pain and she would get a new body that wasn't riddled with cancer. The tears shed from her broken heart would stop, never to return again.

My son Zach once said, "Mom, you can fall down in heaven and you don't even get bruised." That's right, my mother-in-law will no longer experience the bruises of this life. She can throw away her glasses because she can see perfectly now. My mind can hardly grasp the unbelievable things we will see and experience in heaven, but one thing I know is that God will not disappoint!

In June of 2009, with the hope of heaven living strong in her heart, Pat passed away. The last thing my son Ezra said to her was, "We aren't saying good-bye Grandma, we're just saying see you later." Fast forward a year and the Christmas season is upon us again. I can't help but think of all the people who might be hurting this time of year. I often wonder how people cope without the hope of heaven in their hearts?

The way to heaven is not a road, a path, a religion, a philosophy, a mind-set, good works, morality, or leaving a great legacy etc. The way to heaven is a person. Many years ago a baby boy was born on the first simple Christmas. His name was Jesus and he is the only way anyone ever finds heaven. His father, God, wants all mankind in heaven with him, so he sent his beloved son to earth to show us the way.

It's really rather simple. If you want to know for sure that you are going to heaven, all you have to do is believe in Jesus. When baby Jesus grew to be a man he said, "Anyone who hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life. He will not be found guilty. He has crossed over from death to life." John 5:24

Here's wishing you a simple Christmas with the hope of heaven living in your heart!

Merry Christmas,
Heidi

Enchanted

2009-11-01T21:11:00.000-08:00

Every year I like to set new goals in 5 different areas of my life. The 5 categories include: Spiritual, Family, Financial, Physical, and Career. Each year the goal looks a little different. For example, one year my physical goal was to compete in a triathlon. In previous years the goals for this category have varied from losing weight after having a baby, to teaching my kids a new sport. Setting goals gives me direction, motivation, and helps me reach my personal best. I also find a great sense of satisfaction out of accomplishing something seemingly out of my reach. This year my physical goal included a hike through the Enchantments in one day with my good friend Amber. This hike is not a walk in the park. It is an 18 mile looooong, grueling, haul well known as "The Death March".

From the Stuart Lake trailhead, you're looking at around 6 miles and about 4400 feet of gain to the top of the basin, but don't be fooled - 2300 of that 4400 feet is gained in a single mile up Aasgard Pass. (This was actually my favorite part-No Joke!) This route is often described as a level above the Snow Creek route, but many people actually prefer this way in. My friend Amber is an experienced climber, so hiking with her and the near-perfect weather on our side, the day was spectacular.

You can't hike through the Enchantments without being thoroughly and completely enchanted. I was torn between wanting to stop and take a picture every 5 minutes and continuing on to stay warm and make it out before dark. As we hiked, the sun sparkled on the serene lake water, the leaves were changing on the larch trees, there were patches of snow in places, and the views, ....oh the views ...they take your breath away. With mountain goats wandering near by, I found myself dreaming of next years goal. I'm thinking about the Wonderland Trail, but let's not get ahead of ourselves.

Amber and I left Wenatchee at 4:45a.m. and hit the trailhead about 6:00a.m. in the dark donning our headlamps. Soon the sun glistened through the trees and we were pleased to make it to the top of Aasgard Pass by 10:30a.m. We completed our hike by about 6:00p.m.with no injuries, but the the long steep decent left my knees screaming for relief! When we reached the end of our hike we shared a celebratory drink, and all was well! There was a sweet satisfaction of accomplishment and a deep peace within after having spent the entire day surrounded by one of the most glorious places on earth. Mission accomplished!

So, as a coach, I can't help but ask , "What goals are you trying to reach?" Do you need to set a new spiritual, physical, financial, family, or career goal?

Remember, it's easier to say no to something when there is a greater yes ahead!

Happy Goal-Setting!

Coach Heidi

75 Ways to be Happier

2009-08-04T16:12:00.000-07:00

I ran across an article titled 75 Ways To Be Happier, and thought it was worth sharing. I know we can't be happy all the time, but we can learn to be joyful even in the midst of grim circumstances. So, regardless of your current situation, put a few of these ideas into practice and see if you don't feel a bit happier!

75 Ways To Be Happier

Let go of feeling guilty about something

Make a date with yourself to do something you enjoy

Smile

Learn something new

For an entire day, respond to all news from others with "That's wonderful!"

Empty your closet of everything that does not make you feel beautiful

Look at a problem from a perspective other than your own

Make a Joy List

Say "no" to something you really don't want to do

Call an old friend to say "I was thinking about you today"

Take a walk on a clear night and notice the stars

Laugh out loud

Give yourself permission, right now (to be happy)

Once a month, take the scenic route

Take a bag lunch, and eat it in a park

Write down 100 things that make you happy

Take a class, just for fun

Make a new friend

Say "I love you" to someone who matters to you

Write a letter of gratitude to someone who made a difference in your life

Look at something thru the eyes of a four year old

Tell a harried retail clerk, "You have a terrific smile!"

Rather than thinking, "If I succeed"...say "When I succeed..."

Send someone flowers from "A Secret Admirer"

Spend 15 minutes in quiet meditation

Stop doing something that conflicts with your values

Hang around with happy people

Turn in a project the day BEFORE it is due

Go to bed 30 minutes early for a week

Rent and watch a movie that makes you "cry for happy"

Take action on something you're putting up with

Ask questions to understand before you decide your opinion

Hug your friends

Sit with the new coworker at lunch

Sing out loud with the radio

Finish a good book

Share a recipe

Listen to your heart

Write down a "win" at the end of each day

List ten things you look forward to in the next year

Try a new food

Buy a pair of comfortable shoes

Pretend it's the first time you've ever tasted your favorite food

Do a favor for someone

Accept a favor from someone

Perform a random act of kindness

Let go of something (or someone) that's holding you back

Watch a baby sleeping

Say "Thank You"

Say "I appreciate you"

Wish others a happy day

Focus on your choices rather than your limitations

Get excited by the challenge of overcoming an adversity

Tell someone you admire him or her

Take responsibility for a problem everyone else is ignoring

Listen to someone else's story

Do something you've been putting off since last year

Surprise yourself

Think BIG!

Play your favorite song, LOUD!

Seek solutions, not blame

Reach farther than you think you can

Set a good example

Mentor someone

Celebrate small victories

Make healthy food choices

Stop accepting excuses from yourself

Notice how lucky you are to be you

When asked, "How are you?" respond with "I'm fabulous!!"

Say a prayer of thanks

Imagine a beautiful place

Become genuinely interested in the other person

Be early

Share your dreams with a friend

Behave like the happiest person you know...and notice what happens!

Sizzling Summer Time Fun

2009-06-04T17:07:00.000-07:00

It’s summer time, which means it’s the perfect time to relax, smell the roses, and spend some time having fun with your family. For a little help kicking off the summer with family fun, I’ve listed a Top Ten list of inexpensive or free ideas to get your summer celebration started.

1. Pull out the slip and slide and let loose! It doesn't matter if you are 8 or 68 years old, you must slide on your belly. I promise, you’ll squeal like a 5 year old.

2. Have a picnic in the park. Bring a blanket, sun screen, and a basket of your favorite food. Enjoy!

3. Make some fresh iced tea, get a good book or magazine, find some shade under the patio umbrella, put your feet up, and sip your way to bliss.

4. Get your toes out of hiding and paint those babies a fresh, fun shade of summer cheer.

5. Go for a bike ride with your family.If you don't have a bike, borrow one and start peddling. Your kids will love it, I guarantee.

6. Spend some time at the beach, river, lake or pond. Play in the sand, float on a raft, and don’t forget to eat some juicy watermelon.

7. Plan a BBQ. Invite some friends over, fire up that grill, and enjoy a good old fashioned burger with all the fixings. Finish the evening off with strawberry shortcake or ice-cream sundaes. Don’t forget the whip cram and sprinkles.

8. Roast s’mores. Gather the kids, get your supplies, and roast away. For a little variety, replace your chocolate bar with a Reeces Peanut Butter Cup. Ummm, finger lickin’ good!

9. Go for a nature walk at your nearest state park or nature preserve. Be sure to bring the camera to get as many interesting nature shots as you can capture.

10. Grow a garden and have fun eating your freshly grown veggies. Share with the neighbors and encourage healthy eating for your kids.

Cosmic Bowling

2009-05-10T19:41:00.000-07:00

My son Ezra's 8th birthday wish was to go cosmic bowling and invite every boy in his class. He got his birthday wish, and he loved every minute of it. In case you don't know, cosmic bowling is just like regular bowling, only with the added bonus of disco lights and really LOUD music. When I was younger, I used to LOVE loud music, but now....well, I'm not as young as I used to be.

About a week after the party, out of the blue, Ezra said, "Mom, did you know bowling is a lot like life?" I said, "Oh yeah, how so?" He excitedly shared, "It's like this mom, some days you end up in the gutter, and other days you get a strike." I smiled and said, "That's very perceptive Ezra."

I wish every day could be a strike in my life, but some days I fall short and miss the mark. The great thing about bowling parties with a dozen 8 year olds is that you get the option of having rails along the side of the lane. With this fabulous feature, the ball doesn't go in the gutter.

At times, I wish life had the option where I could just push the easy button and automatic rails would pop up and keep me on track. But, then again, I've learned some of life's greatest lessons in the gutter. I've witnessed the amazing character of God! I've experienced his unending love for his broken people. I've received the marvelous forgiveness of God after tasting sin and its ugly ramifications.

God loves all people, yes, even those in the gutter. So, if you missed the mark today and you're feeling blue, just remember God's love endures forever and he will not abandon you if you don't get a strike every time. God is not looking for perfection, he just wants you to stay in the game and do your best.

Psalm 100:5 For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

Living the Life!

2009-04-23T20:27:00.000-07:00

This is Easter weekend at my parents place....a little piece of Paradise

For the Lord is great and greatly to be praised. Ps 96:4

By Your Side

2009-04-23T20:07:00.000-07:00

The other day my good friend Hannah heard one of Tenth Avenue North's songs titled By Your Side. (lyrics below) She didn't know the name of the song, but it resonated with her heart. For a few days she attempted to find the name of the song so she could listen to it again. She didn't hear it on the radio at all, so she gave up trying. The next day, she got in the care to run some errands. Upon turning on the radio, she immediately heard the DJ say, "There is someone out there listening right now who needs to hear this next song." If you can believe it, it was the exact song Hannah was trying to find. She couldn't help but feel God's deep, penetrating love her her in that moment.

I believe God wanted Hannah to know that he cares about the tiniest details of her life. He sees all. He knows about the broken places in her heart. He is aware of the unspoken prayers she carries within. He is familiar with all her ways, her desires, her triumphs, her trials and what makes her heart soar. He wants her to know in the depths of her heart that he will always be by her side.

Hannah, I love you sister, and I will always cherish our friendship! These words are dedicated to you, straight from the heart of God:

Why are you striving these days

Why are you trying to earn grace

Why are you crying

Let me lift up your face

Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love

Why are you still searching as if I'm not enough

To where will you go child

Tell me where will you run

To where will you run

And I'll be by your side

Wherever you fall

In the dead of night

Whenever you call

And please don't fight

These hands that are holding you

My hands are holding you

Look at these hands and my side

They swallowed the grave on that night
They swallowed the grave on that night

When I drank the world's sin

So I could carry you in

And give you life

I want to give you life

(Chorus 2x)

Cause I, I love you

I want you to know

That, I , I love you

I'll never let you go

Do you believe God cares about the smallest details of your life? Are you striving? Are you trying to earn grace? Are you fighting the hands that are trying to hold you? Perhaps you too need to listen to this song and let God speak a personal message from his heart to yours.

Blessings,

Heidi

Going Green

2009-04-18T14:09:00.000-07:00

1 Corinthians 3:6 I planted the seed, Apollos watered it,
but God made it grow.

I just finished planting a garden with my kids, and it was so fun! We all pitched in and helped. I planted, my husband watered, and the boys wrote the names of the freshly planted seeds on home-made stakes. Gabriella threw rocks and mud in Lolo's (our chocolate lab) water dish twice, and uprooted the stakes the boys pounded into the ground. LOL

As we were planting, I was thinking about how fun it will be when we see the first sprouts of our labor. There's just something about digging in the dirt, going 'green' and feeling satisfied with simple pleasures.

After we planted our garden I asked the boys who causes the seeds to grow, and without hesitation they both shouted "God." Perhaps this is a simple concept for them, but I'm still learning how to do my part and then let God do his without trying to intervene.

Maybe this year, as I tend to the garden, I'll let it be a daily reminder of God's provision, providence and power to cause creation to grow in due season. So, join me in 'going green' this Spring. Do your part, and then let God to the rest, no less, no more!

Enjoy those veggies!

What's Your Dream?

2009-04-16T12:52:00.000-07:00

Many people live life with very little passion. They are just going through the motions. Each day is similar to the previous one. Rote. Predictable. Dull. Boring. I hope that doesn't describe you!!! Life was meant to live abundantly!

Sometimes worries, stress, pain, and troubles bring us down. However, life is not always good or always bad. Life is simultaneously good and bad. As triumphs occur in life, so do tragedies. As loved ones die, new life comes forth. As one man reaches a mountain top, another is walking through the valley of the shadow of death. As one family celebrates, another grieves. As troubles consume a nation, another prospers. One gets sick, another healed. One cries, another laughs. One couple marries, another divorces. One mother gives birth to a healthy baby, another buries her child. One man gets promoted, the other demoted. One person is starving, another glutenous. One succeeds, another fails. You get the point.

So, What does this mean for you? It means that you have to have the right perspective, paradigm, and prognosis on life. You need to see the world through the eyes of faith, hope, perseverance, and love. You have a unique contribution that needs to be shared with those around you. You need to dig up your buried dreams and pursue them at all cost. You must close your eyes and ears to the lies of the world, and the deception of the enemy. You have to face your own fears so that you might live your dreams.

It's time to change your life! The world needs your unique passion, purpose, dreams, and inspiration. Let nothing get in your way! Do you still need a little inspiration? Check out Susan Boyle on you tube. (link below) She is an incredible inspiration to us all!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxPZh4AnWyk

I hope this has inspired you! Now get out there and resurrect your dreams!

Heidi

Theme Verse

2009-04-07T10:56:00.000-07:00

Zep 3:17 The LORD your God is with you,
he is mighty to save.
He will take great delight in you,
he will quiet you with his love,
he will rejoice over you with singing."

Every year I pick out a theme verse to use as my standard, comfort, encouragement and inspiration. This year, Zephaniah 3:17 seemed to call out to me. In January it kept flashing in my mind like a neon sign. I would think of it often, like a song I couldn't get out of my head. Obviously God knew I would need to hear this message repeatedly throughout the year.

Sometimes I'm a bit slow picking up on the signals God is trying to send me. Perhaps that is why I need repetition, or maybe a two by four over the head. Thankfully, God didn't use any hard objects to knock me over. He just sweetly whispered the message of Zephaniah 3:17 over and over until It got down into my soul.

It seemed like every time I turned around, God was reminding me that He was with me always...ALWAYS...always! He was showing me through the richness of his word that he alone is mighty to save. No one, I repeat, NO ONE else can save me except him! HE IS MIGHTY TO SAVE! He saves me for eternity because of his undying love for his broken, often clueless children. But, he also saves me from myself, my sin, and my self destructive ways. Where else can I go? He alone saves!

These past few months, God clearly knew how much I needed to hear that He delights in me, despite myself. It's often hard for me to believe. Yeah, he likes me, but delighting in someone takes it to a much deeper level. Amazingly, he really does delight in me, and he delights in you too! He doesn't just tolerate you, he divinely delights in you.

Speaking of delight...one day I was just about to tuck my sweet little Gabriella (age 2) into bed. But as I held her in my arms, I couldn't seem to put her down. I just wanted to hold her forever and freeze time. My heart was exploding with love, tears began to fall down my face as I cherished her and kissed her adorable little cheeks.

Right there in that moment, God spoke to me. Not in an audible voice, but with thoughts in my mind that I knew were straight from his heart to mine. He said, "This is how I delight in you all the time. I never let you go. I quiet you with my love, even when you resist me. I rejoice over you with singing. You are my beloved. You are my beloved. You are my beloved!"

I was moved in my spirit. The tears continued to flow. I tucked my precious Gabriella into bed and rejoiced over her with singing. All the while, I was imagining God doing the very same thing to me. That night I was quieted by his love and moved in my spirit by the very intimate presence of God delighting in me.

It should come as no surprise, that very soon after that experience, I ordered a new One Year Bible with Zephaniah 3:17 engraved on the cover. Perhaps this verse will be one I'll need to cling to for life and not just this year. God is engraving it on my heart as I learn to love and trust him deeper.

Friend, let him quiet you with his love. Don't ever forget that he delights in you all the way to the cross and back again!

Have a Blessed Easter,

Heidi

You Did What?

2009-04-01T18:36:00.000-07:00

You wouldn't believe me if I told you some of the crazy things my boys have done. They are 8 and 6 years old and only 17 months apart. They are all boy, full of life, mischievous, and extremely competitive. They feed off one another and at times lose their minds. No exaggeration! Some day I hope to channel all that energy into the right places, but for now, it's like trying to keep a beach ball under water.

They keep me on my toes to say the least. If I hadn't grown up with two brothers, and if I wasn't a proud, self-proclaimed tomboy as a child, I think I would lose my mind. Little did I know, all those crazy things my brothers did to me while growing up would turn out to be front-line training for motherhood.

I was double-dog-dared to do things I never should have done! Now, I find myself saying some of the same things my mother said to me. "Be careful!" "What were you thinking?" "You weren't thinking were you?" "You did what?"

As much as I love and adore my boys, they do keep me humble. Recently, a little friend from the neighborhood enticed our boys to go two doors down and ring the doorbell. That house happens to be the Senior Pastor of our church. All the while, when I thought our boys were happily playing in our yard, they had other plans. Unannounced to me, they walked down to our Pastor's house, rang the doorbell and unashamedly told Pastor John that their favorite Pastor was not him, but the Worship Pastor.

Weeks later, when all of this came out, my husband and I were completely humiliated. Granted, the Worship Pastor's daughter happens to be our regular baby-sitter whom our kids adore. Perhaps that had something to do with it, but we were still embarrassed. Not to mention, we weren't sure how to handle the situation.

We could say our boys were just repeating something they heard, which would be a lie. Or, we could try to pass it off as "boys being boys" which would be an excuse and only make things worse. We could do nothing at all, but that would cause my anxiety to shoot through the roof. So, we settled for my best home-made chocolate chip cookies as a peace offering, along with a card that was smothered with words of adoration for our beloved Senior Pastor. The cookies were delivered by our boys, who were nearly threatened with their life to be on their best behavior!

Weeks later, it's now water under the bridge, but I've learned my lesson far too many times to ever let pride resurface. But hey, at least I can hold on to the promise that God gives grace to the humble. I'll be needing that grace real soon! If you're a mom, you know exactly what I'm talking about, so just do as I do and cling to the following verse:

James 4:6 "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble."

The Best Bedtime Story Ever

2009-03-31T20:40:00.000-07:00

I just finished tucking my kids into bed, and my son Zach, who is in kindergarten, just told me the following: "Mom, I can't wait until Satan is thrown into the pit of fire and he burns his bottom. Then I will throw rotten eggs in his eyes and stab his ears with long, pointy thorns. Then I'll strip him naked and push a fake crown of thorns on his head until he is bloody everywhere. It will be awesome!"

How's that for a bedtime story? I thought it was brilliant. No, we haven't been watching horror movies or playing any war games. For his young age, Zach has a great understanding of our enemy. We talk about how Satan is a deceiver and how he loves to tempt people to make wrong choices. Zach knows that the enemy is on a mission to steal, kill and destroy. However, Satan also knows his time is short before God deals with him.

Revelation 12:12 But woe to the earth and the sea, because the devil has gone down to you! He is filled with fury, because he knows that his time is short."

I have to admit, I too have thought of many undesirable actions I'd like to take out on Satan. Thankfully, our enemy will fall into the hands on an omnipotent God. Woe to Satan and his dominion then. The wrath of God will be poured out like never before. Satan will come to his end once and for all! He will be thrown into the lake of burning sulfur where he will be tormented day and night for eternity. Zach loves this part and so do I!!!

I am so glad that we have the privilege of knowing who wins this war we are all engaged in. Satan might snare us, and perhaps we lose some battles along the way. In fact, maybe we lose quite a few battles and we have the scars to prove it. But take heart, when you are feeling down in the dumps because you just got your butt kicked by Satan, lift your head high soldier and tell your enemy who wins this war! For those of us who believe in Jesus, victory is already ours!

Now that's a bedtime story I'll never forget! The evil dragon who is out to get Zach, is forever slayed by Zach's protector, creator, and Lord of all Lords!

Swimsuit Ready

2009-03-31T20:31:00.000-07:00

Spring has sprung and Summer is right around the corner. That means it’s time to get *swimsuit ready.* That’s right, the time is NOW! So, what does that mean for you?

It’s training time! If you want to get fit, gain muscle, lose fat and gain energy, read on! Here are some fail-proof tips for summer fun in the sun. And I do mean fun in your swimsuit, not covered up in sweats or baggy clothes.

First, when you do your cardio workout, be sure to give it your all. In other words, if you aren’t sweating, you probably aren’t burning any fat! Think intensity not duration. A short 20 minutes of cardio at full intensity is better than an hour of cardio where you are barely breaking a sweat.

Make sure you are doing a cardiovascular workout 6 days a week. Then do not fail to take your rest day. You need the day off to refuel. Now some of you might be thinking 6 days a week is extreme, but not if you are serious about getting fit. I am not talking about spending hours in the gym. You should not have to spend more than 3-4 hours a week in the gym to be in fantastic shape.

The truth is, three to four 20-30 minute high intensity workouts a week is enough to trim fat, gain muscle and boost energy. Many people have bought into the myth that in order to lose weight you have to spend hours upon hours on the treadmill or at the gym. I see women all the time doing the same workouts every day and not losing a pound. If you really want to see results, you have to train with intensity. So, switch up your routine, make sure you are sweating, and add new goals to your workout every two weeks. Just make sure your goals are challenging, yet attainable.

If you want to put on muscle, be sure to lift weights. Weights will not make you look like a man, it will give you that lean, toned, shapely look. Yes, muscle does weigh more than fat, but muscle looks a whole lot better in a swimsuit than fat.

Finally, if you really want to see amazing results, start eating 6-7 mini meals a day. Make sure each meal does not exceed 350 calories. Be sure to eat lots of protein and carbohydrates that are healthy and not filled with sugar and fat.

The combination of cardio, weight training and eating healthy is a no-fail plan to reach your fitness goals. I’m not saying it’s easy, but it is possible. Remember, my motivational mentor Jim Rohn says, “It’s better to have the pain of discipline than the pain of regret.”

Don’t skimp on discipline and miss out on the upcoming summer fun in the sun!

Great is His Faithfulness

2009-03-29T16:15:00.000-07:00

Lamentations 3:22-24 Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. 23 They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

I'm often encouraging my two boys to memorize scripture along with me. Lord knows I need the Word hidden in my heart as much as they do,....if not more!!! This week I was helping my oldest son (8 years old) memorize Lamentations 3:22-23. He said, "Mom what does consumed me?" His question caused me to meditate on this verse rather than just memorize it. The more I contemplated the message behind these words, the more humbled, broken, and grateful I became!

I know we can't be perfect, but there are days when I feel like a complete failure. Can anyone relate? Some days I make bad choices, act crabby, or think more about myself than others. It humbles me when I think about the God of the universe having compassion on my shortcomings.

Like fresh hot coffee in the morning, his compassion and mercies start my day off right. Thankfully, his faithfulness doesn't waver based on my moods. His love keeps me from being consumed in my own sin. Great is his faithfulness!!!

Now If I could just keep my hand over my mouth for the rest of my life, maybe I won't say things I will later regret. But then again, it's the power of his unending mercy, love and faithfulness that draws me to him. When I'm wrapped in his arms of love, filthy with sin in my heart, I understand on a whole new level what godly love truly is. Breathing in his embrace, I never want to leave this place. Where else can I go to find what I'm looking for? He is all I need! Great is his faithfulness!

When I go to bed at night, even after making really poor choices, I am not consumed! No, I am not consumed! Tomorrow morning, I'm going to get up, grab some hot coffee and feast on his new mercies and compassions. Great is his faithfulness!!!

Surrendered

2009-03-17T11:22:00.000-07:00

This morning, I woke up with a heavy heart. Today is St. Patrick’s Day, March 17^th, 2009. It’s also my sister’s birthday. But we won’t be having a party, or a cake, or celebrating at all. My sister is dead. She died in a car accident when she was 21 years old. I was 20. She was only 13 months older than me, and all these years later, I still grieve her loss. With her spirited personality, red hair, freckles and Irish heritage, she was destined to be born on St. Patrick's day. Every year, St. Patty's day brings a painful reminder of how precious and short life is.

Her death ripped through our family like an unexpected massive earthquake, leaving us shattered, torn and crushed. Together, we walked through the valley of the shadow of death, with no choice but to pick up the broken pieces.

The grief from her loss left us angry. I was angry at God, angry at the world, angry at the circumstances surrounding her death, angry at Satan, and yes, even angry at myself. In the past, there were times when I felt like I was slipping over the edge in despair, drowning in my grief with so many unanswered questions swirling in my head. My heart became hard. Life became rote and lifeless. Apathy seemed to destroy any momentum to accomplish even the simplest of tasks. The big question of “Why God,” seemed to haunt me.

However, God, being true to his nature, is good all the time, even when we don’t get it. And, in the midst of it all, God was pursuing my grief-stricken heart. He was there the whole time giving me grace to sustain and strength to move on. In time, he soothed my anger and softened my heart. He penetrated the enormous walls I had built. I had been fighting him and pushing him away, when all the while he was trying to embrace me with his everlasting arms of compassion, understanding and love.

It took months and months, even years, of wrestling with the unanswered Why’s in my life, before I learned how to surrender my anger and my grief at the foot of his cross. Even then, in my foolishness, I pick them up and hold tightly to them, only to wrestle once again to the point of exhaustion. Will I ever learn? Give me the strength God, to surrender my pain to you. You alone are the only one who can relieve me of it. Let me not return to pick it up again. And if I do, meet me in a personal and intimate way. Whatever it takes, teach me once again to trust you in all things.

Perhaps my questions will remain unanswered this side of heaven, but God has exchanged my *why’s* with a peace that surpasses understanding, and he will do the same for you. Someday, I will see my sister again in heaven, but for now, I thank God that he cared so deeply, he carried me when I was too weak to walk. He embraced me in my anger. He lovingly brought me to a place of security and surrender in him where I can boldly proclaim:

The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD." Job 1:21

Happy St. Patrick’s Day!

Puppy Love

2009-03-06T17:38:00.000-08:00

My son Ezra (8) prayed for a new puppy for 3 years. His prayers were so persistent, they worked! One day we had the following conversation, "Mom, I just know God is going to give me a puppy." "Oh yeah, how do you know?" "Because I've prayed for 3 years and I know God hears my prayers." "Yes, he does!"

We had discussed the simple answers before, such as: sometimes God says No. He often says wait. Other times he says yes. In the mind of a (then 7) year old, he saw no reason why God wouldn't want to give him a dog. So he prayed and prayed and prayed fervently. His prayers reached more than God's throne, they touched my heart. If I could give my son the moon, I would. Especially if I knew it was good for him.

Then it hit me. God did give me the moon. He created the moon, sun and stars for me and all his children. He created the heavens, the earth and everything in it for you and me. Why? Because he loves me! Because he loves you!

Matthew 7:9-11 "Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? ¹⁰Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? ¹¹If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him!

After 3 years of persistent prayer, Ezra got his puppy and I learned a lesson about the gracious gifts of the father. These gifts from come in all shapes and sizes. The gift Ezra had prayed for arrived with a playful personality, 4 legs, and chocolate fur from head to wagging tail. Ezra was over the moon, and I, forever grateful for a God who lavishes us with magnificently good gifts!

Window of Grace

2009-03-05T16:11:00.000-08:00

My mother-in-law is dying....She has very little time left here on earth. Her son, my husband, is with her now. He has been visiting her regularly, knowing her time is short. She lives about 3 hours away from us. With each visit their conversations grow deeper, sweeter, and more profound.

Recently they have had a close relationship, but it hasn’t always been that way. So, as she is slipping closer to death, he is cherishing their last conversations together. This trip, he asked her to forgive him for any way he had offended her over the years. Although he’s done this before for specific issues, this time he wanted the whole slate clean.

We have both lost family members to sudden death in the past, so we’re familiar with the tidal waves of grief that surface time and time again. One day your loved one is here, and the next, they’re gone. No time to say good-bye. No season of setting things right. No window to embrace, kiss, cry, or laugh one last time. It’s too late. They’re gone. ...forever! So, you live with the unspoken conversations day after day, month after month. Wishing! Wanting! Regretting! Longing! Despairing!

Whatever way you leave this earth, death is never easy. Especially, for those of us left behind. That said, there is a *window of grace* that is a beautiful thing. It’s a window of opportunity given to the dying and their loved ones to say all that needs to be said. Yes, it’s an agonizing window to peer into the suffering and sickness of someone you cherish. You feel helpless as you watch them slowly fade away. Nevertheless, it’s a gift to serve, honor, cherish, relish, encourage, and pray for the loved one who is dying. It’s a window of grace for all involved to purge the important issues of the heart, to forgive, absolve old wounds and say a proper good-bye.

If you find yourself in the midst of this soon to close window, seize the moment and don’t hold back. Let yourself grieve what should have been and could have been. Grieve what was, and what is. Express love without reserve. There is no room for pride or perfection in this window. They will only hunt you down and haunt you. Instead, cling to acceptance, forgiveness and grace!

Let God comfort you as you mourn and let go. Let him strengthen you, and shower you with his grace as you come closer and closer to your last conversation. Make it good. Make it real! Let it be overflowing with heartfelt grace.

“The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away. Blessed be the name of the LORD." Job 1:21

Good Morning Sun

2009-03-04T14:53:00.000-08:00

Psalm 8:2 "From the lips of Children and infants you have ordained praise."

If you are a parent, no doubt you’ve heard of the book, Goodnight Moon. It’s been a favorite in our household with each child. My kids learned quickly how to delay going to bed. They simply said Goodnight to every object in the universe before finally going to sleep.

Well, my daughter could write a new book titled Good Morning Sun. At around 18 months, she began her ritual of waking up elated, bubbling with joy, kisses all around, and exuberant to explore the world around her. After getting out of her crib,she would run straight to the living room windows, throw open the shades and enthusiastically exclaim “Good Morning Birds.” Only it sounded more like, “Good Monin Burrds.” For months and months she began her day talking to the birds and chirping out happy phrases to the world around her.

She was only 1 at the time, but it was if she was teaching our family how to live in the moment, slow down, and celebrate each new day God had given us. She stood at the window taking it all in. Oh the splendid sunrise, the sweet little melody of the birds, blue sky, green grass, butterflies, flowers in bloom and the glorious mercies of God are new every morning. Little Ella was basking in the goodness of God each morning. Her joy was contagious! Her praise, unstoppable!

Yes, parents have the awesome responsibility of teaching and training their children, but my children have been my greatest teachers. They have taught me to sacrifice, to be humble, to love deeper, to laugh longer, to be present and engaged, to forgive quickly and to simplify. The list is endless, but after watching Ella’s morning ritual, I will never take for granted another morning.

Good Morning Birds. Good Morning Sun. Good Morning flowers and trees. Good Morning clouds and surrounding sky. Good Morning God. Good Glorious God, let my praise be as exuberant as Ella’s!

The Road Less Traveled

2009-03-04T14:44:00.000-08:00

MT 7:13-14 "Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.”

Have you ever noticed the broad path often requires no self-control? It’s well-beaten, alluring, captivating and welcoming. It’s almost as if it beckons you. It calls you by name and tells you to give in. Come on, do what everyone else is doing! Take the easy path, relax, indulge. Treat yourself, you deserve it. No doubt, the broad path has its sinfully delicious moments along the way. But, it has a sneaky way of chopping your character at the knees. Integrity often falls by the way side. Honor and nobility are not needed on the wide path.

Oh the other hand, the narrow path leads to life, and not just life, but abundant life! The narrow path undeniably requires integrity, courage, hope, faith, honor, nobility, patience, self-control, obedience, diligence, perseverance, character and discipline. I know, these are not exactly popular words in this day and age. But then again, the narrow road has never been popular.

In The Road Not Taken, the famous words of Robert Frost, say it best:

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood, And sorry I could not travel both And be one traveler, long I stood And looked down one as far as I could To where it bent in the undergrowth; Then took the other, as just as fair, And having perhaps the better claim, Because it was grassy and wanted wear Through as for that the passing there Had worn them really about the same, And both that morning equally lay In leaves no step had trodden black. Oh, I kept the first for another day! Yet knowing how way leads onto way, I doubted if I should ever come back. I shall be telling this with a sigh somewhere ages and ages hence; Two roads diverged in a wood, and I- I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.

I don’t know about you, but when I come to a crossroad, I want to be able to take the narrow road every time. To do this, I must plan. I must prepare for the snares. I have to proactively patch up the weak spots in my armor. Of course this means I have to wear the armor in the first place. It’s easy to get discouraged, throw off our armor, and join the crowds on the well-beaten broad path. Sadly, many people get stuck here, and become desensitized to the traps of the broad path.

What's the solution? Prepare for battle. Get equipped. Wear your armor at all times. So what is armor? Armor is truth, a.k.a. the bible. Armor is prayer. Armor is spending time in the presence of God. Armor is intentionally choosing the road less traveled. And that my friends, has made all the difference!

Hope in God Alone

2009-03-04T14:34:00.000-08:00

Due to the recent election, I have received an onslaught of emails regarding politics. I am not writing to share my political stance today. However, I will say that whatever side of the fence you stand on, we each have a responsibility to those in authority over us. We have the honor and privilege to pour out our requests, prayers, and entreaties to God on behalf of our leaders. Yes, that includes those in high places we don't particularly respect.

It is an honor and privilege to stand in the gap on behalf of our world’s leaders. Come to think of it, it becomes an accountability issue, when you consider we are asked by God himself to do this. True to the amazing nature of our Lord, he has asked us to intercede for our leaders for our own good, and the good of the nations. Not to mention, it pleases him. Need I say more?

1 Timothy 2:1-3 I I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone— for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior.

I staunchly believe Kings, Queens, and Presidents have the power and obligation to make profound changes for the people at large. But, at the end of the day, I get peace of mind, rest, security, protection, hope, power and position from God alone. When I wake up each morning, it’s NOT the President who causes the sun to rise and the grass to grow. Nor does he have authority or power to forgive my sins and wash me in his glorious new mercies. Kings and Queens make promises, but it’s the word of the Lord that stands forever! In him, I live and move and have my being.

Don’t get me wrong, God can use both wicked and righteous leaders to do his bidding. And he does!

Proverbs 21:1 The king's heart is in the hand of the LORD, he directs it like a watercourse wherever he pleases.

Who have you been looking to for hope, for change, for a new vision? If it's not the King above all Kings, it's time to realign your allegiance! God alone is our hope! HE ALONE IS OUR HOPE!!! Thankfully, we have assurance that both the ideals and burdens of this world can be entrusted to Him. After all, I know of no other leader who has conquered death!

Colossians: 1:16-18 For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together.

What's Your Golden Calf?

2009-03-04T14:33:00.000-08:00

Each of us is called to live a victorious, joyful, and purposeful Christian life. The down side is that we live in the midst of an idolatrous society. Mankind has struggled with idols since the Garden of Eden. One example of idol worship is found in the book of Exodus. In chapter 32 we learn about a ridiculously foolish decision the Israelites made. After realizing their leader Moses was not returning as promptly as they liked, they turned to Aaron and asked him to make them new gods. Long story short, they made a golden calf and worshiped it.

Some Idols are obvious. Others are subtle and secretive. A golden calf lands in the glaringly obvious category. When reading this account, you might conclude these people are idiots. That is, until we get real about the idols we hold dear.

What are your idols? What dominates your thoughts? Typically, the things we think about throughout the day are spent on the items and issues we treasure and trust. An idol can be any possession, person or thing we put our hope in to bring us fulfillment. Idols are any goal or aspiration that becomes more important to us than God. Slowly and subtly we form an allegiance to idols that have the potential to dominate and control our lives. Sounds a bit too close to home, doesn’t it? I’ve been there; done that, wish I hadn’t!

Some idols we cherish, others we loathe. Often, we can’t seem to break our allegiance to them. So, the question remains, how do we rid ourselves of these idols? We train! We train hard! We train until we’re blue in the face!!!

Motivational Speaker, Jim Rohn, states, “You will either have the pain of discipline or the pain of regret.” It’s a choice to be disciplined. It’s a choice to train with power and purpose.

Training with purpose involves acknowledging the idols in our life, and praying for God’s help to remove them. Training includes reading the Word daily and living it to the best of our ability. If we want to slay the golden calfs’ of our heart, we need to train our minds, heart and bodies to live in a way that is pleasing to God. This doesn’t mean passively throwing up a few prayers when we think of it. It means we should train until it costs us. If we bleed, so be it. If there are holes in the knees of our pants, ..good, keep praying, keep training! Whatever it takes, we can not give up! Ask for accountability, seek professional help if need be, but lets get on our knees before God and ask for his divine help! Did I mention, NEVER GIVE UP? May we all have supernatural strength to passionately tear down the “golden calf’s” in our lives. God, reveal the idols of our heart. Show us how ridiculously foolish we are for putting our trust in anything besides you! Let the cry of our hearts be “Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God Almighty who was, and is, and is to come.” Rev. 4:8

Envious Ambition

2009-03-04T14:31:00.000-08:00

Luke 15 tells the story of the Prodigal son. This rebellious boy rips the family apart by making really poor choices. He dishonors his father and squanders his inheritance by indulging in self-centered, foolish behavior. Dramatic as this story is, we can all relate on some level. Made stupid choices? Me too!

Thankfully, this son “came to his senses” and returned to his father, humbled and broken. With the weight of the world on his shoulders, he came desperate for forgiveness and mercy. He was immediately embraced, forgiven and loved on by his father. A party was thrown in his honor. This was an occasion to celebrate! The party of the year! A son was lost and now he was found. A former sinner scarred with shame, disgrace, and a shattered reputation, found redemption in the arms of his father.

Are you in need of this kind of love? Run, run, run with wild abandon, to the arms of your heavenly father. He is waiting to embrace you and celebrate your return. He's a love-sick father. He is love! Nothing pleases him more than a child running to the sweetness of His embrace.

This story in Luke is obviously rich in meaning. It teaches us about the plight of the prodigal, the love of the father, and the jealous heart of an older brother. See if you can spot any jealousy in this passage.

"Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. [26] So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. [27] `Your brother has come,' he replied, `and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.' "The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. [29] But he answered his father, `Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. [30] But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'"

The older brother was overcome with jealousy. He was angry at his father’s grace and compassion. He was oozing with pride and envy. My heart goes out to the older brother. He had been faithful. His younger brother clearly had not. Granting grace and forgiveness to the undeserving is a true test of faith.

Thankfully, the lead role in Luke 15, is not the prodigal or the jealous brother. It’s the unconditional, almost unbelievable, love of the Father. Our ultimate aim is to become just like the father. He extended grace, mercy and forgiveness to the most detestable of sins.

Notice, in the story, the older brother refused to participate in the celebration. He chose to sulk alone. Envious ambition had clouded his thinking. Embracing jealousy brought him nothing to boast about. Jealousy destroys friendships, families and fellowship. Let us learn from this and be known for love, charity, acceptance and the like. May we stand with arms open wide. There are droves of prodigals in need of embracing. After all, we too are fellow prodigals.

Give Thanks

2009-03-04T14:27:00.000-08:00

As a mom, I’m constantly telling my kids, “Don’t forget to say Thank You.” Some days, I actually think they’re getting it, and I'm rather impressed. Other days, they appear to have learned nothing,... squat, zero, not a single licking thing!!! I might as well talk to the wall. If you're a mom, you know exactly what I'm talking about.

I often wonder If Jesus felt like no one was listening to him. What did he feel when he spoke the words of life, and some ignored him, dismissed him and turned against him? When he performed miracles and healed the sick, he wasn't looking for praise, but a simple thank you goes a long way.

On his way to Jerusalem, Jesus healed ten men with leprosy. This was by no means politically correct! But then, Jesus never cared about being PC. His objective was to do the will of his father, despite the outcome. Now that’s a leader I can follow!

The Law of Moses required anyone with a skin disease to stay outside the walls of the city, unless a priest declared him clean. Their exclusion from the city would have been humiliating in and of itself. Yet shame was heaped upon shame when they were forced to cry out “unclean” to publicize their presence. Can you imagine? The hope in their hearts must have been nonexistent. Nevertheless, these outcasts, whose stench of rotting flesh reached the high heavens were desperate. They were entirely dependent on charity to survive. So, when they saw Jesus, they cried out “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!” Overflowing with pity, Jesus cleansed all ten of them as they responded in faith to his instructions.

Imagine the reaction of this group of ten men. Their experience with reclusion, shame and the ugly effects of leprosy, no doubt bonded them in a dreadful sort of way. These 10 men must have been jubilant as they were cleansed before their very eyes, restored to society, and welcomed home. Sadly, only one out of the ten men returned to thank Jesus.

Before we become Christians, we too are unclean. We're in need of the grace of God to touch us, heal us, cleanse us, and forgive us. All we have to do is ask, and the gifts are ours for the taking.

I've been a Christian for many years now, but I pray that I never slip back into society and forget to give thanks to the one who gave me new life. May you and I NEVER forget to fall at the feet of Jesus and give him the praise and thanks he deserves. He alone is worthy to be praised!

PS 100:4-5 Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name. For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.

Anger; Stuffin' or Puffin'

2009-03-04T14:22:00.001-08:00

Been angry lately? Yeah, me to! Anger is an emotion that is common to all of us. It’s a signal that lets us know something is amiss. We can’t stop the emotion, but we CAN learn to express it appropriately.

Anger is a natural response when our basic convictions of right and wrong have been violated, our essential needs haven’t been met, or our character has been attacked. Anger can surface when our goals are blocked, injustices have occurred, we’ve been misunderstood, judged, humiliated, overlooked, mocked, rejected, betrayed, …. you get the point.

I find comfort in knowing that even Jesus was angry. Although, his anger was always righteous! Anger can be a fantastically good thing when expressed appropriately. Such as becoming indignant over glaring injustices. In fact, we’d do our world a favor if we were rightfully angry more often. Bede Jarrett expresses, “The world needs anger. The world often continues to allow evil because it isn't angry enough.”

But, since we aren’t Jesus, and our hearts are very susceptible to sin, we can learn a few things about anger. In Ephesians 4:26-27 we read some profound words of wisdom.

“In your anger do not sin": Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold."

This verse tells us anger should be dealt with every day. Why? So it doesn’t fester. So we don’t hurt ourselves or others. So we don’t become bitter. So we’re not consumed and controlled by anger. Whew, ready to hear some ideas that will help you?

Our natural instinct is to respond by either Puffin’ (expressing) or Stuffin’ (suppressing) our anger. Instead of falling into either of these traps, put these principles (below) into practice.

1. Pray and ask God for his grace and strength in dealing with your hurt and
anger.(2 Co 12:9-10)

2. Find a quiet place to examine your heart and journal your thoughts. (Ps 4:4)

3. Take responsibility for your own sin and confess it. (1 Jn 1:9)

4. Do not take revenge, let God avenge. (Ro 12:18-19)

5. Deal with your anger biblically. (Mt 18)

6. Do not let your heart become hardened. (Eze 36:26-27)

7. Forgive. (Co 3:13)

If you find that your anger seems out of control…either today, or at some point in the future…don’t give up pressing in to God. Cry out to him daily, hourly, or minute by minute. Know that God has a different way, a better way. His way brings peace and freedom.

Anger has been an open door for me to grow in intimacy with God. I’ve fallen on my face before God, steaming in anger, pleading for his help. Right there in the midst of my messy, muddled life, God is present. He is not afraid of my anger. He is bigger than the well of wounds deep within my heart. He can handle the tidal waves of rage that surface inappropriately and unexpectedly.

He understands! He is dreadfully acquainted with sorrow and grief. The cries of his children reach his throne. He hears. He knows. He cares. He longs for you to drop your anger at the foot of his cross and leave it there. How do I know? Because his word says so, that’s why!

That's Wonderful!

2009-03-04T14:19:00.000-08:00

I once read about a man who claimed to be a Happy Coach. Intrigued, I read about his philosophy. Although I disagreed with many of his claims, I did agree with the idea that we can choose to be happy whenever we want to. He encouraged his clients to try an experiment. He told them that their responses to each situation do, in fact, have a profound effect on their lives. Therefore, he told them to respond with 2 specific words to every situation. It didn’t matter if the circumstances were good or bad. Either way, they were to respond with “That’s Wonderful.” After doing this for an allotted time, many of his clients claimed to be happier.

I decided to give it a shot. So, I recently went to a Chiropractor. I’ve been to numerous Chiropractors in the past, and several of them have claimed I am beyond help. I was in a car accident where I whiplashed my neck in a really twisted way. As a result, I have a ridiculously messed up neck. Additionally, I have a herniated disk in my neck. Well I spent 3 hours with this new Chiropractor. He ran all sorts of tests, took x-rays, and measurements etc.

Afterwards, he proceeded to tell me that my head tilts to the right, the curve in my neck is actually backwards and tilted to the right, my right shoulder was higher than the left, my left hip was higher than the right, my pelvis was tilted to the right and my right leg was longer than the left. He waited for my response after his grim report. I was determined to follow through with my assignment, so I looked him straight in the eye and cheerfully said, “That’s Wonderful!”

He literally laughed out loud and said none of his patients had ever responded in that manner. My messed up neck had not changed, but we were both happy. It was a good lesson for me to look at life from a different perspective. It’s true, we do find what we focus on. I’ve never changed a thing about my life by worrying, fretting, panicking, letting anxiety run wild, or sulking. I have however, lost sleep and precious time by filling my mind with worries. I’ve even worried myself into a terrible mood and ruined certain days because of it. Can anyone relate to this?

If you can, that’s wonderful. You have room to grow, as I do!

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Let us be determined to focus on the excellent and praiseworthy. Time, health, and relationships are too precious to waste on worry.

Life Balance

2009-03-04T14:18:00.000-08:00

Do you live a balanced life? My guess is probably not. Don't worry, no one can live a perfectly balanced life in every category at all times. What you can do however, is take a good honest look at your life and see what adjustments need to be made. Imagine your life as a wheel divided into 8 equal categories:

1. Personal/Spiritual Growth
2. Family/Friends
3. Career
4. Money
5. Fitness/Health
6. Fun/Recreation
7. Physical Environment/Home
8. Romance/Significant Other

Draw a wheel on a piece of paper and divide it into the 8 categories listed above. On a scale of one to ten (10 being highest) rate each area as it applies to your life. Are you surviving or thriving? A score of “10” means that you are absolutely satisfied with that area of your life, and that you are thriving in it. A score of “1” means that you are dissatisfied with that area, and you are not thriving in it.

For each area write 2-3 key words which indicate the reasons for your rating. For example, if you gave Fun/Rec. a rating of 2, explain why. (Ex: working 60 hours a week, too tired, lack of time etc.) Is your life fairly balanced or really out of balance? If it’s way out of balance, I imagine your life is defined by bumpy rides. The objective is to evaluate honestly where you are now and where you want to be in the future. The goal is to balance your wheel so that your life is characterized by smooth, steady revolutions.

Ask yourself, what do you want each area to be rated 12 months from now? Get 2 pieces of paper and fold each one so that it is divided into four separate categories. Write the name of one life category in each section at the top so that you have a total of 8 life areas. Describe what you really want in each of the eight categories listed. What would a 10 look like in each area in the next 12-18 months? Begin by taking the four areas that have the lowest scores. Treat each area separately. You will end up with eight bulleted lists, each focusing on one category of life.

Focus on what fulfillment would look like for you in each distinct category within a specific time period. Describe how you see yourself living out each specific area. Use the present tense for your bullets or paragraph. Write as if you already have that area working at a level ten.

Consider the high price you pay when you’re NOT living the life of your dreams! The goals you create for each category will draw you towards them as you take action to increase each individual area to a ten. Be patient with yourself. You won’t achieve perfect 10’s in every category over night. Celebrate the movement you are making to increase each category’s rating. If need be, read books, find a mentor, seek out accountability, utilize resources to inspire you, or seek out professional help. Most importantly, pray and ask for God’s help. Remember, God is the one who wants his children to live life to the “full”!

John 10:10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.

De-Stress Your Morning

2009-03-04T14:12:00.000-08:00

Psalm 143:8 Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.

Are your mornings ever rushed, stressful and hectic? How would you like to have a peaceful, relaxing, stress-free morning? Wouldn’t it be great if every morning, you could wake up, grab your coffee, get wisdom from the word, and pour out your petitions before God? The great news is, you can! Before you even get in the shower, you can feel relaxed and at peace, because you’re starting your day off right.

Don’t fall into the trap of procrastination, living out of balance, and leaving little time for what matters most. Instead, realign your life to be in tune with your values. Build margin into your busy schedule and leave room for the unexpected. Plan, prepare and wake up with ears to hear and eyes to see the important, not the urgent. Then when the urgent matters come along, you will be well prepared to handle them. Instead of waking up with anguish over all your unsolved problems, wake up expecting to “Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love.”

Put these tips into practice and see if you don’t have a stress-free morning!

Top 10 Tips to De-stress Your Morning

1. Set your alarm 20 minutes earlier than usual.
2. Read your Bible for 10 minutes (or longer).
3. Pray for 10 minutes (or longer).
4. Get your coffee pot ready the night before and press brew first thing in the
morning.
5. Make lunch for you and your kids the night before.
6. Pick out the clothes you plan to wear the night before and set them out. Do
the same for your kids.
7. Run the dishwasher before going to bed, so you have clean dishes in the
morning.
8. Listen to music you enjoy.
9. Eat breakfast slowly and enjoy it. For those of you who skip
breakfast...DON’T!
10. Meditate on 1 verse a week. Put it on your mirror or your refrigerator, so
you see it frequently.

Happy Morning to you!

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

2009-03-04T14:10:00.000-08:00

Have you ever come to a place in your life where you have no idea what to do? I certainly have, more times than I can remember! It’s not a fun place to be, especially if you don’t do well with the messiness of life, the unknown, or waiting. Urg…the waiting, it’s a difficult thing for me. I want to have everything planned and prepared, but often God has different plans.

Although, we wouldn't need faith if we had no need to wait on God, live in the chasm of the unknown, or deal with the disarray of life. I NEED faith! It seems like I need faith more and more as I grow in the Lord.

In 2 Chronicles, King Jehoshaphat was in a place where he didn’t know what to do. I find encouragement and direction from the wisdom of this wise King. Do you ever feel like everything is against you? Well, Jehoshaphat experienced just that! He was told a vast army was coming against him and his people. Alarmed, he sought God and proclaimed a fast for all Judah. Perhaps the King was terrified, worried about the lives of his people, or clueless as to how to lead.

We can learn much from Jehoshaphat’s action plan. He immediately resolved to pray and fast, and he called the entire community to join him in this. Maybe you are one step ahead and you've already done this, but you still have no clue what to do. Take heart, the king prayed,

“For we have no power to face this vast army that is attacking us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you.” 2 Ch 20:12

Oh how those words must be music to God’s ears! He is aware we frequently don’t know what to do. He’s just waiting for us to ask him. He knows we are perplexed with our decisions. He sees our anxiety. But, there is something undeniably sweet about a child asking for help. When we lay down our pride, our plans, and set aside our own power to fix our eyes on God, he hears and he acts!

God moved on behalf of Jehoshaphat’s prayers and delivered him and his people. He delivers us too when we make bad decisions and we turn to him for help. He delivers when we make good decisions and feel overwhelmed. He delivers when we're stuck in the pit and we have no idea what to do.

If you have decisions to make while life is messy or unclear, follow in Jehoshaphat’s footsteps, and fix your eyes upon Jesus. He will fill your heart with peace and give you rest that only he can give.

2 Chronicles 20:30 “And the kingdom of Jehoshaphat was at peace for his God had given him rest on every side.”

10-10 Devotions

2009-03-04T14:08:00.000-08:00

I used to work for a church that practiced 10-10’s. So what are 10-10’s you might ask? Ten-ten’s are a simple principle to get people to spend time praying and reading God’s word daily. The head pastor found that many people did not have a regular devotional practice.

In an attempt to promote daily devotions, he came up with a simple principle. Read the word and pray for 10 minutes every morning. Pretty simple! To make sure this happened, he encouraged his congregation to set their alarm 20 minutes earlier than they normally would. He also pushed them to write it down as an appointment on their daily planners/calendars. Why? Because, it’s harder to break an appointment if it is planned and written down.

He told his congregation to set their bible out on the table the night before. That way everything would be ready when they got up. If they needed strong coffee, they could prepare it the night before too. In doing so, they could hit the ground running as soon as they brushed their teeth.

Many people attending church began a new devotional habit. Some rekindled old habits or continued their daily practice. Almost all who jumped on board with the 10-10’s soon found themselves lingering longer. Ten-ten’s moved into 20-20’s and 30-30’s. And, so it is when simple principles become life changing habits.

It can be said that the 20 minutes they spent per day in prayer and bible reading, were the most important and profound 20 minutes of their day. What are the most important 20 minutes of your day? Do you need to implement 10-10’s, 20-20’s or 30-30’s in your life? Everyone has an extra 20 minutes a day, so set that bible out on the table tonight. Get your coffee going and set your alarm for a few minutes earlier than normal. Tomorrow morning let the fun begin. Never underestimate the power of a daily habit.

Life After Divorce

2009-03-04T14:02:00.001-08:00

Sometimes life just doesn’t turn out as expected. I have a number of friends who are divorced. As a Counselor, I know all too well, there are always two sides to a story. Sometimes, both partners are selfish and hard hearted. Other times, one partner betrays the faithful one and things get pretty unpleasant. Nothing is ever cut and dried. When it comes to relationships, issues of the heart get easily tangled.

One of the ugliest things to witness, is the raw emotions of one flesh being torn apart for all the wrong reasons. My heart has broken multiple times, as I've stood on the outside of a crumbling marriage. I’ve watched the damaging effects on the children involved. I’ve listened to the sobs of a broken spouse grappling with their wounded heart and no partner to lean on. I’ve been in the midst of bitter fighting over ridiculous matters. I’ve watched hurting divorcees plunge themselves into addictions, desperately trying to numb the pain. It’s heinous, dreadful, and atrocious to observe. Divorce grieves God’s heart more than we will ever know this side of heaven

But, with God, there is ALWAYS hope! Does God love those who have been divorced any less? Absolutely not! Will God fall out of heaven over divorce? Of course not! Was divorce God’s plan to teach a lesson or punish people for past sin? NO, NO, NO!!! Is there hope for a better future for those who have been divorced? Unequivocally, YES, YES, YES.

Jeremiah 29:11 states, For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

In the aftermath of divorce, all might appear lost, lonely, hopeless, and shameful. But the God I know and serve is one who specializes in embracing the sick, the oppressed, the broken, the distraught, the lonely, and the shamed. He not only embraces them, he pulls them right out of the pit and places their shaky feet on solid ground.

The Lord Himself declares plans to prosper, not to harm, plans of hope and a future for his people. The God of the universe is not too small for pits as large as the Grand Canyon. He stoops down. He embraces. He lifts heads and he lightens loads. He speaks life and liberty to the dead places within. He throws off all condemnation. Not partial, but ALL condemnation. He delights in his own and calls them his beloved. He wraps them in his love for all time. He never leaves them. He never forsakes them. He always lives to intercede on their behalf. When life doesn't go as expected, all is not lost. God is bigger!

For the Love of Mashed Potatoes

2009-03-04T13:55:00.000-08:00

A year ago, my parents celebrated their 40th anniversary. Although they have a great marriage, it certainly wasn’t always a road filled with bliss. The newlywed euphoria ran its course sometime in the first few years. Reality soon set in and the hard work began. Sure, there were things that came easy. Areas they were compatible in enhanced the fun and romance. But, there were seasons that weren’t pretty. Forty years takes its toll on the body. So obviously youth and beauty were not traits they could fall back on in recent years.

Although they vowed before God and friends to be faithful in plenty and in want, sickness and in health etc., there were days when love seemed lost. Yes, they remained faithful, but a lot of life takes place in 40 years. Sickness, depression, financial ruin, chronic illness, cancer, and the death of a child left scars on their hearts that only God could heal. But, they made a covenant with God they refused to break. The love they share has gone from fresh, sweet, passionate, and exciting, to a loyal, understanding, powerful, patient love. It's a rare love that only surfaces with deep, deep, deep roots.

It’s the kind of love that knows when to keep silent, even when you think your spouse needs a verbal lashing. It’s a love that asks you to sacrifice more than you believe you are capable of. It’s a love that rests on the promises of God and His ideal plan for marriage, rather than the fickle feelings of the heart. It’s a love that forgives wounds that you won’t soon forget, without the help of a higher power. It’s a love that stays together when your child leaves this world before you do. It’s a love that refuses to be shaken to death by the world and its flirtatious lies. It’s a love that grows old and gray, but with each passing year, the legacy of love grows stronger, bigger, wider, higher and deeper. This kind of love, never fails. Never!

Today, many choose to follow their heart and do what feels good. The heart however, cannot be trusted. We are fickle, emotional, and at times irrational beings. Our feelings, whims and appetites change like the tides.

"Jer. 17:9 The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?"

Let us grow up and come to our senses. Let us step up to the front lines and fight for our marriages. Too much is at stake. Generations born, and yet unborn need a foundation to stand on. Our children need to see more marriages like my parents. My aging father has had to give up skiing, sailing, running, and most walking due to a bad hip. He has stopped driving at night as a result of failing eyes, and he only wears his hearing aid half the time. Recently, my mom asked him if he had seen an advertisement on T.V. about Max Lucado. He responded, “Did I see a mashed potato?” Together they laughed and together they love until death do they part.

The Gift of Gratitude

2009-03-04T13:54:00.000-08:00

Have you ever heard anyone say they are grateful for suffering? It’s clearly not a common occurrence. It brings to mind those who suffer from chronic pain. For all of you who suffer from a chronic illness, I just want to say I know, I care, and I am right there with you. I’ve experienced the raw emotions that come from pain so severe that I’m left in despair, crippled with shattered hope, asking God why, why, why?

If you suffer from any torturing chronic illness, you fully understand the magnitude of pain I am referring to. In my case, I get migraines which have been classified as "the worst non-fatal affliction to mankind." The full blown cycle of a migraine can cause the strongest of men to plead for mercy. Migraines are more than a bad headache!!! They cause throbbing pain, typically on one side of the head, often accompanied by nausea, vomiting and extreme sensitivity to light and sound. Sadly, I am not alone in my suffering. About 28 million Americans suffer from severe migraines. Needless to say, my compassion runs deep for my fellow sufferers!

Unfortunately, migraines are a common malady in our family line. I have suffered from migraines since I was 5 years old. I usually get anywhere from 10-20 a month. They seem to plague the women in our family. As of today there is no known cure for migraines. Modern medicine has certainly advanced in time, but the medication comes with a high cost. They bring unwanted side effects and stiff bills. This poses a challenge for me to be patient, and I can quickly find myself expressing a bad attitude and lacking gratitude. It’s the ones I love the most who usually get the brunt of this sassy attitude.

But, in the book of Philippians, the apostle Paul states, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.”

Now my flesh wants to scream, how incredulous! How can I give thanks for __________.......you fill in the blank. Come on, we’ve all been there. But, I am a work in progress and thankfully I’m learning and growing in my faith. I refuse to stop praying and petitioning God for healing, not only for myself but for my fellow sufferers. And some of you may find this hard to believe, but I've actually learned to pray with thanksgiving for my migraines. Do I do it right every time? I think you all know the answer to that one, but I am making progress, one baby step of faith at a time.

Migraines have given me new perspective for life as it is. On the days when I'm migraine-free, I’m filled with...you guessed it, ...gratitude. Such sweet relief compels me to kiss my kids more and hug my husband a little tighter and a little longer. God has given me the gift of health...if only for a day. Health has new meaning in our household!

By the way, I know this is a side note, but I wanted to mention that I know to the depths of my being that God loves me beyond measure, even if he chooses not to heal me here on earth. The migraines I have endured have been a brutal teacher, but I've learned what it means to live with gratitude, in suffering or in health, even when everything in me begs for a place to express a really rotten attitude.

Each day is a gift, so don’t replace gratitude with a bad attitude. Don’t kick the family dog, or wound those you love with hurtful words. There is a better way, it’s a gift called GRATITUDE!

Attitude Check

2009-03-04T13:53:00.001-08:00

As a parent of 3 young children we’ve had more than a few conversations about attitudes in our household. One of the foremost Christian radio evangelists in the country, Chuck Swindoll articulates,

"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company or a church or a home.

The remarkable thing is that we have a choice every day. We cannot change our past: we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play the one string we have--and that is our attitude.

I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it. And so it is with you--we are in charge of our attitude.”

Enough said, how can I add to that?

Where There's a Will, There's a Way

2009-03-04T13:52:00.000-08:00

I learned to alpine ski when I was young and I’ve been hooked ever since. But, since I grew up with 4 siblings, we didn’t exactly have the luxury of all the extras. So, if I wanted to ski, I had to pay for it. Since I was highly motivated, I worked several jobs in order to support my habit. You’ve heard the saying, “Where there is a will, there is a way,” and I found it.

When I was in high school, I learned about an opportunity to work on the slopes in the summer for a few weeks. In doing so, I was able to get a season pass. It was a great adventure, and a whole lot of grunt work. The guy I worked for was a serious slave driver. His nick-name was spike, if that gives you any clue. That said, I really respected his work ethic. In the end, he even told me that I worked harder than the guys. Coming from him, it was one of the greatest compliments I’ve ever received.

Another year, I found out about a program where I could teach little kids how to ski. In turn, I got a season pass. Granted, I spent most of my time on the bunny hill and fetching hot chocolate for the kids. Oh, and we took multiple trips to the bathroom, which took an exorbitant amount of time. It takes a looooong time to zip, unbutton and snap all their gear. Those few winters were one of the highlights of my life. It was very rewarding to teach kids a sport they would be able to enjoy for life.

Fast forward a decade or so, and I am now teaching my own boys the love of skiing. It’s a fantastic feeling riding the chair with the enthusiasm of little boys about to burst with excitement. “Which run should we go on next?” “I want to ski every day of my life.” “Watch me Mom!” “Let’s go on our secret passageway.” The world of winter wonderlands, enchanting runs, spectacular views, and the allure of jumps has them captivated. When it is blistering cold, a trip to the lodge for hot chocolate does the trick.

If you have a will to get fit, there is a WAY. Don’t let your goal simply be about exercising or losing weight. Expand it, enlarge it, and have fun with it. Make your goal about enjoying life, being healthy, teaching others, joining a community, making new friends, and broadening your horizon. We only live once, so get out there and make a way to fulfill your goal.

In the book of Proverbs, it says, “A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul.” I can attest to that! My longing to ski when I was in high school was fulfilled. Now, my longing to teach my children is being fulfilled. How sweet it is!

No Wennies Allowed

2009-03-04T13:50:00.000-08:00

Most of us don’t struggle with a desire to be fit. It’s actually getting out there and exercising that can be hard for some. One reason exercise can be difficult is because we have taken the fun out of it. Who wants to do something that isn’t fun?

I won’t lie, exercise is hard work, but it can, and should be fun! One of the biggest reasons people quit exercising is because they are trying to do something they don’t enjoy. Instead of forcing yourself to do something you hate, find something you actually enjoy and do it. 1 Thessalonians 5:16 says to “Be joyful always.” Yes, you can be full of joy while sweating like a pig.

As a child, I used to love riding my bike, but somewhere along the way, I stopped riding. Once I was in my 30’s with kids, I decided to start riding again. I had seen a number of people road biking around town and I thought I might like it. But, they had fancy gear and clip-in shoes, and I was intimidated by it all. I wasn’t even sure how to put a helmet on right. Back when I was a kid, we didn’t use them.

Well, I didn’t let that stop me. I borrowed a road bike from a friend and the first trip out, the chain fell off. I got grease all over me trying to put it back on. Then, I clipped my shoes into the pedals and went for it. When I came to the first stoplight, I fell right over and bruised myself from my hip to my ankle. I was a ridiculous sight, but I learned fast, and now I am addicted. If I had given up, I’d be missing out on one of my favorite forms of exercise. Now, it doesn’t even feel like work to me. It is a fabulous way to de-stress, get a great work out and take in the beautiful scenery.

A local sports shop in town put together a Ladies Bike Club. Yes, I joined! They offer 4 supported rides a year. About 40 ladies age 20-70 all ride 15-25 miles together. We end our ride at a local winery and have a delicious catered meal together. We also get to taste the local wines. After the fun is over, our bikes are loaded on the trucks by the guys supporting us on the ride. We affectionately call them the cabana boys, or some call them the “cabikea” boys. They take our bikes back to the sports shop, while the ladies ride back in limos. We all wear the same bike jersey that says, “No Weenies Allowed” on the back.

It has been one of the best forms of exercise and fun in my life. I have met some amazing people, seen beautiful country, and sipped delicious wine among friends. I’ve even participated in a number of triathlons. Who would have thought exercise could be so rewarding and FUN! Find something you enjoy and get out there and do it. If you haven’t found something you like, try something new, and don’t be a weenie about it!

Mat Carriers

2009-03-04T13:48:00.001-08:00

It’s been several days since my last migraine and I could kiss the ground. A new day has dawned and I think I can fly! I’m back from the dead. Well, not really, but I’m refreshed, revitalized, rejuvenated, and recharged.

When my health is good, I seize the day. Cake anyone? Champagne? Okay, skip that last one. It might trigger the onset of a new migraine. Frankly, I'd rather give birth to a 10lb. baby, than have another migraine. (Which, I've done, by the way) Anyone familiar with this kind of pain? If so, you know what it means to want to pull your hair out, or shoot yourself up with the strongest medicine available? You wonder, can you possibly make it through these trials for years to come? Do you even want to?

Typically, I get back on the horse of life duties fairly quickly. But this past month has been different. With 3 weeks of back to back migraines, I felt crushed from all sides, exasperated, and near hopeless. Due to the unremitting pain, my heart was growing sick. There seemed to be no light at the end of the tunnel.

For whatever reason, the migraines reached a new level of intensity and frequency. I fought and I fought with everything in me. But, this time, I had nothing left to bounce back. Over the years, I have prayed every imaginable prayer I know how to pray for healing. But, God has not healed me, at least not yet. I’ve wrestled with him through many sleepless nights. I've cried until I had no tears left to cry. I've begged him and petitioned him. But this time was different. I knew I needed the help of my friends. I could no longer bare this burden alone. I asked them to pray for my healing and to help “carry my mat.” They immediately responded with encouraging emails, prayers, meals, tears of compassion and cards. They even surprised me with a trip to the spa. It’s always nice to have gorgeous toes when you feel like crap!

I was deeply moved by their generosity, compassion and love. I felt as if God himself was beside me, comforting me, encouraging me, and reassuring me that he was near. I have no doubt that when Jesus saw my friends rally to carry my mat, he too was deeply moved. This month, my friends brought the hands and feet of Jesus to our dinner table, our doorstep, my discouraged heart and down the street to the spa. I have the best friends in the whole, wide world!!! However, the world is in need of mat carriers. So, lets’ get out there and pick up the corner of a mat.

Money Management

2009-03-04T13:47:00.000-08:00

Money is a mirror. How we handle our money tells a great deal about ourselves.

Money reveals our values. The way we spend and earn money is an accurate depiction of what we value most in life. It is often far more accurate than what we say we value.

If you haven’t managed your money well, don’t beat yourself up, just consider the principles and begin taking action steps to reach your financial goals. One of the first steps in managing money is to get clear about your intentions and attitudes regarding money. Some people loathe the thought of having a budget. However, managing money increases your freedom. You know exactly where your money is going and you are free to spend it on what matters most to you. Instead of money controlling you, you can control money.

Many of us grew up with strong messages about money. These messages may have come from your dad or mom or others. Stop and ask yourself if those messages were really true, or do you need to reprogram your thoughts and attitudes? Many of us were taught that money is evil. The Bible clearly states that not money, but the love of money leads to evil. Any idol that we set up for ourselves in place of God leads to destruction. Money itself is not evil at all, but idolizing it to the point where we neglect what matters most in life can certainly lead to evil beliefs, thoughts and actions.

Another common belief about money is that people who are wealthy have fewer problems. Take the very wealthy for example. We get a glimpse into their glamorous lives and at times it’s difficult not to be jealous or compare ourselves with what seems so “unattainable.” But don’t be fooled, the rich deal with the same emotions that we do. The only difference is that they are wealthier. They often feel happy, excited, successful, overwhelmed, unhappy, jealous, discontent, angry, bitter, unhappy, lonely, unloved, frustrated, rejected and even out of control when it comes to managing money.

A common fallacy about money is to believe money is scarce. We live in one of the richest countries in the world. Money is not scarce in America. Why do you think so many immigrants risk their very lives to live in America? It is the land of freedom, wealth and opportunity!

Another myth is that having a budget is too complicated. Certain aspects of financing can be complicated, but a budget requires simple addition and subtraction. The success of managing money stands on one premise: Spend less than you earn. If we buy into the myth that money is complicated, we begin to blame others for our lack of management. Managing money is simple, but resisting the urge to splurge on “wants” rather than needs takes a good dose of restraint. Finding creative ways to increase your income and slash your budget can help you achieve your personal financial goals. Get creative, use your natural inborn gifts, skills and talents and start generating some extra income!

If that doesn’t work for you, there is always the option of being frugal. Being frugal is different than being cheap. Being frugal means getting the most value out of every dollar you spend. It opens up the door to creativity. Many people have found great satisfaction in finding valuable treasures on craigslist, e-bay or garage sales for a fraction of what they would pay in the stores. There are all kinds of creative ways to sell items for extra income as well.

I hope this has been an encouragement to you as you take action to live a fruitful and fulfilling life!

The Power of Choice

2009-03-04T13:46:00.000-08:00

Sometimes knowing that we have the “power to choose” can really rub us wrong. Let me explain. When my son Zach was 5 years old., he had difficulty following directions without getting distracted. If I asked him to pick up his socks and put them in his laundry basket, he seemed to get lost on the way. Although he did have a special talent for finding101 other amusing things to do. When he was confronted on the matter, he repeatedly claimed “I always have a bad day.”

After one loooooonnnng morning of parenting, I had this awful picture in my head of my son as a grown man. There he was, as a 40 something year old, married with kids and still pulling the ole, “I always have a bad day spiel." I was thinking of the message it would send to his future kids. My goal for my son is not for him to be a couch potato, Cheeto eatin', rock band master, perfecting his craft into the wee hours of the night. Would his mind turn to jello? Before my thoughts digressed completely, I pulled myself back into reality and thought, I must do everything in my power to channel this energy now!

Right then and there, I got down to my son’s eye level and told him to repeat after me loud and clear.

“I have the power to choose if I have a bad day or a good day.”

After saying this 101 times, ....okay we only said it once, but the impact was profound on both of us. This was a hard pill for a 5 year old to swallow. I’m still learning about the power of choice as an adult. It’s not easy to choose to have a good day when you’re sick, or you feel kicked around by those closest to you. It’s so much easier to place the blame on others, isn’t it?

I have to admit, being a mom has refined me, like it or not! There's something about knowing little eyes are watching and mimicking my every move, that motivates me to make good choices. But, on those days when I fall far from maturity, I'm grateful for my son. His victories and failures remind me, that I too, have the power to choose to make it a good or bad day. To that end, I'm even more grateful for a God who loves us so much he gives us choices, second chances and grace to grow and mature!

My Favoirte Things

2009-03-04T13:44:00.002-08:00

One evening when it seemed like our entire family was having one of those horrible, ugly, really bad days, I decided it was time to change the mood. I called all the kids and told them to climb up on the bed with my husband and me. I suggested that we talk about our “favorite things.” There we were, all 5 of us in our p.j.s, sandwiched together, taking turns sharing stories about the things that bring us joy. Slowly, our moods began to change for the better. And before we knew it, the stress of the day seemed to fade in to the back of our minds. We felt lighter, happier, more relaxed, and focused on the things that really matter. We had so much fun and because we all felt so much better, we decided to make it a family ritual.

Now, what would a fun bedtime ritual involve in the mind of a 7 year old boy? Well, wrestling or some sort of dog pile of course! Our oldest son Ezra’s favorite thing to do is to make a human sandwich. We all squeeze together on the bed and he decides who is the bread, mayonnaise, mustard, ham and so on. Our other son Zach (then 5) loves hugs. He likes them so much we had to classify them into 3 distinct categories. In the Boyle family we give “baby bear hugs,” which are soft little squeezes, “mama bear hugs”, which are long, nurturing, and cuddly, and “papa bear hugs,” which are the grand-daddy of all hugs. If you get a papa-bear hug, you’re likely to be hugged so hard your ribs will bruise. Zach can’t get enough of these. He’s addicted and so am I.

Once when my husband and I were traveling in Brazil, our son Zach, who stayed home with my parents, called to say he wished he could give me a papa bear hug. I wanted so desperately to squeeze him and hold him as tight as I could, for as long as he would allow. I wanted that hug so bad, I hung up the phone and cried. There’s nothing like a papa-bear hug from those you cherish and love!

Little Gabriella’s (then 16mo.) favorite things are pop-up books, peek-a-boo and tickle monster. She loves being pulled by her brothers on a blanket around the house for kicks and giggles, blowing sweet kisses, and snuggling under her favorite pink blankie. Her spider-man "doll" is a must for her too. And yes, she does keep up with her big brothers!

As I sat there in bed after that looooong, ugly, stressful day, listening to my kids share about their favorite things, I realized I had so much to learn from them. Have you ever noticed how you don’t have to teach a child how to play?

Children have a uncanny ability to savor the best things in life. They have a natural aptitude for engaging in the present moment, not rehashing their past or becoming filled with anxiety over their future. They’re quick to forgive, resilient and so teachable. Sharing our favorite things as a family is a much needed ritual to keep us centered on the most important things of life. Here I was thinking I was teaching them a lesson.

Have you had a bad day lately? Are you having one now? Let the mouths of babes bring you a new perspective. When the woes of the world seem to weigh you down, simply stop and become like a child. Think of your favorite things and see if you don’t feel a little lighter.

Forgiveness Fest

2009-03-04T13:44:00.001-08:00

Col. 3:13 Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

Growing up with 3 older siblings, there were frequent disagreements in our home. My parents did their best to teach us how to forgive. But, we often said sorry in the most sarcastic way possible. You know, the sorry that taunts rather than restores. It was said simply to avoid punishment, and NOT with the right heart. Terrible?! Yes, but we did it….frequently.

Fast forward several decades. Now, as a mother, I’ve do my best to teach my own children the power of forgiveness, repentance, and reconciliation. I intentionally train them to have the right heart and attitude. Saying sorry with a sassy attitude is not too common in our home. That said, we’re all still in process of learning how to do this the right way. Regretfully, we’re all guilty of acting like 2 year olds now and then. I'm talking the kind of tantrum you would die of embarrassment over if your pastor saw it.

Don't believe me? Here’s a look into a day in the life of the Boyle Family. One fine day, we all decided to go skiing. My parents were watching Gabriella (2). The rest of us headed up the mountain. The sun was shining. A winter wonderland surrounded us, and all was well. We were content, chatting happily.

Until…everything unraveled. All of the sudden, I heard a screech. I turned around and Gabriella’s plastic doll was flying through the air. It whacked our son Ezra’s (then 7) eyebrow so hard, blood was squirting everywhere. The doll was thrown by Zachary (then 6) who was mad at Ezra. His master plan was to teach his older brother a lesson. To his credit, he didn’t really want to make him bleed.

My husband and I were instantly annoyed. I turned around and tried to stop the bleeding with anything I could find in the car. At this point, blood was everywhere. Right about then, Ezra started panicking and screaming. You would’ve thought he’d been shot. Flying down the highway at 65 miles an hour, my husband was swerving all over the place. He was desperately trying to find a place to pull over. Tension took over and I started snapping at him. “Geez, don’t get us all killed!” Perfect timing for sarcasm, right? Well he had a few choice words for all of us too. Honoring words? NO!

Zachary, seeing the mess he caused, started screaming too. I couldn’t tell you what he was saying. Some sort of fear-filled gibberish, shock, sorrow, and a touch of stubborn pride were all coming out at once.

After the wound was bandaged, we sat at the side of the road silenced by our sin. We had all offended each other. We needed forgiveness. Over the next few minutes, we voiced our grievances, asked for forgiveness and let it go. It was a full on forgiveness fest. We felt cleansed, released, and guilt-free! The requests were truly genuine and actually coming from the mouths of my own kids. It was one of the most glorious experiences ever! We continued up the mountain, soaking in the peace of a family recently reconciled. Life was bliss…at least until our next Forgiveness fest!

Trusting in the Midst of Despair

2009-03-04T13:38:00.000-08:00

Psalm 91:2 I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.

In 2005 I was pregnant with my 3rd child. My husband and I already had 2 boys. As much as I adored our little boys, I admit, I was hoping for a girl with that pregnancy. Of course I would have been happy with either gender. But in my heart, I dreamed of having a little girl to raise.

I had a typical pregnancy with serious morning sickness, as was usual for me. Before we knew the gender, I had accumulated tons of girly things. It was my way of hoping, dreaming and nesting. I figured I could pass these items along if our baby was a boy. Either that, or he would wear pink for the first 3 months of his life.

My dreams were realized when the ultrasound revealed our baby was a girl. My heart soared! I Think I asked the technician 10 different times if he was certain about the gender. It was quite obvious, so the walls of the nursery were painted PINK!

A month of so later, everything changed. I went to my O.B. for a quick appointment at 22 weeks along and that’s when I began to panic. The doctor said he couldn’t find the heartbeat with the doppler, so he immediately rushed me to an emergency ultrasound. It was then that he told me our baby was dead. What? Did I hear right? I must be having a nightmare! I sat in shock for quite some time. I was frozen, unable to speak or reason. Mentally, I rejected the news, but my heart was already breaking inside.

The O.B. didn’t know why this had happened. He told me the baby was “the picture of health” at the mid-term ultrasound. I had no signs, no sickness, no indication, just sudden death. After I could breathe again, I called my husband and somehow chocked out the grim news. Together we cried, as our sweet promise of a baby girl was now dead. I never thought the day would come, when my child would die before me.

For medical and personal reasons, I chose to deliver the baby. I won’t go into the gory details. Just know it was awful!!! While waiting for my body to endure the unpleasant effects of pitocin, our pastor came in to pray with me. With tears streaming down my face, I looked him in the eye and said, “I don’t understand, but I trust God’s heart.”

I didn’t go through the stages of grief as the chief of holiness by any means. But, because I know God intimately, I know I can trust his heart! Yes, even when I don’t get it! On perhaps the worst day of my life, I knew God was pouring out his love on me. In his providence, he decided to take our daughter, but all the while he was giving us grace to endure, strength to rise above, and open access to his throne for anything we would ever need.

If your heart is broken over something you don’t understand, let me tell you friend, you can trust his heart. We may not ever understand his ways or his reasons this side of heaven, but we can always trust the heart of God. Always!!! We can trust that only he knows all things, and holds all things together for his divine purposes. Even if you don’t get it, even if your questions will never be answered, will you trust his heart?

(Check out the blog post Good-bye)

Good-bye

2009-03-04T13:31:00.000-08:00

Good-bye

By God’s providence you were conceived

Our hearts could hardly contain the joy we’d receive

At the mid-term ultrasound we found out you were a girl

We were over the moon with thoughts of pink and long hair to curl

We dreamed of your future and all of life’s beautiful what if’s

Little did we know dreams were all we’d be left with

Suddenly, out of no where, you were gone

What were we to do with this endless bond

Your heart stopped beating

Our hearts started bleeding

We went to the hospital so I could deliver you

Daddy stood by, praying that somehow we would make it through

We held you in our hands and said our good-byes

And the tears wouldn’t stop flowing as hard as we tried

We left the hospital with no baby to cherish

Who would have thought our sweet promise would perish

We sat in your nursery with no baby to rock or soothe

Someone please tell us how to go on or get out of bed and move

We spread your ashes and felt our hearts burst

Didn’t anyone tell you, you weren’t suppose to die first

Weeks turned into months and life moved on

But your loss left a hole in our hearts far too deep and long

At times it’s hard to cope when we think of what could’ve been

And we yearn for heaven to be with you forever again

Oh sweet little Elizabeth Grace, we’ll never forget your darling face

Hour by hour we’re clinging to Jesus to fill the hole left in your place

For now Jesus will sing you sweet lullabies

And he’ll hold you in heaven where you have no reason to cry

Good-bye

Check out my post on Trusting in the Midst of Despair

Dancin' David

2009-03-04T13:28:00.000-08:00

Recently, I have been studying the life of David. I can relate to him in many ways, both in his failures and triumphs. Despite his numerous failures, he was called “A man after God’s own heart.” I hope the people who know me best, can in all honesty, call me “A woman after God’s own heart.”

After David became King, his desire was to bring the Ark of the Covenant to the city of David. He was so excited about moving the Ark of God, he and the entire house of Israel shouted and rejoiced to the sound of trumpets as they brought up the Ark. It was a true celebration and David lead the charge. Out of his love for God, and what the Ark of the Covenant represented, he could not hold back his praise. So, before all mankind, he threw off all restraints and danced before the Lord with all his might!

At this point, he could care less what the people thought. His wife Michal, on the other hand felt much different about the matter. When she saw her husband, leaping and dancing down the street, wearing only a lined ephod, she was mortified. She was so humiliated, she despised him in her heart. Later, she let him know how revolted she was with his actions. In disgust, she told David that he acted as low as any common vulgar fellow would.

David responded by telling her that his actions were not for her or the crowds, but for an audience of one. The man after God’s own heart, had only one person on his mind. He danced for his King, his Lord, his God, and no one else. Nothing would stop his celebration, and yes, he would become even more undignified if need be.

I often think of David when I watch my daughter interact with her daddy. She adores him, and he in turn, thinks the world of her. She is 2 years old and loves to sing and dance, especially if her daddy is watching. The other day, I was changing her clothes. Before I could get her dressed again, she heard the garage door open. She knew it was her daddy coming home. She jumped up immediately and ran right out into the garage buck naked, for all the world to see. She had one thing on her mind, and that was running to the arms of her daddy. She could care less if she was clothed or not. For her, it was time to celebrate. Daddy was back home and for the moment, nothing else mattered.

May we learn to dance like King David, for an audience of one. No restraints!

Mighty Man

2009-03-04T13:06:00.000-08:00

John 15:16 “You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you to go and bear fruit—fruit that will last."

In a world that often focuses on accomplishments, looks, beauty, success, money, glamour, sex, materialism, and comfort, it’s not hard to feel like we don’t measure up. Growing up, I often felt inferior. I believed I was average at everything and good at nothing. Over the years, I realized I was defining myself by what I could achieve. I graded my every performance. If I didn’t measure up, I did a fantastic job beating myself up.

It took having my own kids to realize that I am not loved and valued by what I produce or accomplish, nor how I look. I am loved, simply because I am a child of God. When my children were born, they did little for the first three months, other than eat, sleep and poop. Nevertheless, the adoration I had for them took love to a whole new level. I didn’t love them for what they could do for me, nor how they looked or how intelligent they were. I loved them, purely because they were mine!

God loves you and me, simply because we are his! He chose us in the depths of our depravity. He pursued us to the point of giving up his beloved son to rescue us. This is a message I wanted to burn into the hearts of my children. I was determined to teach them that God has a great destiny planned for each of us, just because we are His. So, from the time my boys could talk, I started a nightly tradition where I asked them “Who are you?” Now, if you asked an adult this, most likely they would tell you what they do for work. Not so with my boys. They would boldly and without hesitation say, “I am a mighty man of God with a great destiny.”

For now, they are little boys, but all too soon they will be grown and gone from my home. If I teach them anything, let the following message be seared on their hearts and minds for all eternity: God Almighty choose you and He has called you by name, set you apart for his purposes and has appointed you to bear fruit!

At times they might not feel like mighty men, but God…but God. What beautiful words…but God. He is all we need. I think they are getting the message loud and clear. They are now teaching their 2 year old sis that she is a mighty woman of God with a great destiny.

One day my son Zach, was visiting my mom and dad. A friend of theirs saw Zach, and said, “Who are you?” Instead of saying, “I’m Zach,” like a typical 5 year old would, he said, “I’m a mighty man of God with a great destiny.” Mission accomplished! If he knows who he is in God, before he even speaks his name, something is working. Remember, you are not the sum total of your accomplishments, looks or right/wrong choices. You are a MIGHTY CHILD OF GOD WITH A GREAT DESTINY!

Mercy in the Morning

2009-03-04T12:47:00.000-08:00

Obedience comes with blessings, but it doesn’t always come natural! Sometimes when I ask my kids to do something and they ignore me, or don’t do it, I get frustrated. If they grumble, talk back, and have a sassy attitude after I have explained myself clearly, I can get irritated. This morning was one of those mornings when I wondered if everyone in the world got up on the wrong side of the bed, or if it was just my family?

This past week, we took a vacation and splurged on our kids. We wanted them to enjoy some fun adventures. They had the time of their lives, but by their actions, you would never know it. This morning, they were acting obnoxious. I wish I could say, not my kids, but no! A good friend of mine always says that marriage and children are the great equalizers.

Whether that’s true or not, today, I was humbled. I wasn't humbled because my kids were so unruly I didn’t even want to claim them. I was put in my place because I was reminded of my own sin. Granted, my kids were disobedient, but so am I, more often than I’d like to be. Thankfully, before I digressed into self-depreciation the following verses popped into my mind:

Psalm 145:8 The LORD is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and rich in love. And Lamentations 3:22-23 Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

If it were not for the Lord's great love and mercy, I would be consumed in my own sin. Thank God there are only 24 hours in each day, because, tomorrow morning is a new beginning. By the time the sun comes up tomorrow, his compassion, love, faithfulness and mercy will be waiting for you and me. They are new for us to unwrap each morning. So, let's wake up and be consumed by God's love which cannot be bought, destroyed, shaken or out sinned.